What a wonderful message. I am 70 years old and marvel at how quickly comfort turns to chaos. We were so afraid of COVID and now are faced with the death of innocents at the hand of a crazy man, death of our beloved children at the hands of crazy people with guns, and now 50 years of personal freedom brought to an end. It's too much! But now I'm reminded that we breathe in the moment and that's where the holy spirit lives for each of us. Thank you Nadia!
Well said, Judith. I am also (very nearly) 70. I am more alert to possible dangers, especially when I visit my 94 year old client who lives in lower downtown in Denver. I've been coming here for 7 years and have never had any trouble or concerns. I enjoyed being in the area because it was becoming a beautiful place to be. But of recently I have been concerned about the amount of drug trafficking's goings on in the restored Union Station, and people with guns. I need to stop, breathe, engage with YahWeh, and bring peace into myself in the present and be grateful for the good folks who are at work trying to keep us safe. I am safe. No bad things are happening to me right now, except all the distress of what I read, see and hear has taken a toll on my nerves and my husband gets to experience my stress, something he does not deserve.
My stress sneaks up on me. My poor husband. He's such a good guy but never knows what to expect. My daughter sent me a link for Nadia. Love, love, love her. Her words keep me centered and that chases the stress away. Be still and know that I am God - and breathe!
My breath centers me and is my strength and grounding. I've had voice training since maybe age 12 or 13. So, an awareness of my breath and how I'm using it, how it is giving strength to my body and volume to my voice has just always been a normal part of my life. My breath relaxes me because it is my source of power and strength.
Nadia, I loved how you brought up the idea that oxygen itself is the breath of God breathed into us. Just like breath itself, God is my source of strength and the one who centers me and gives me rest when my body and mind are refusing to slow down.
A while ago, I tried to do an exercise where I would try to replace my fears with truth. I'd pray for example, "I fear......., but God, I know......."
For a while, I found the exercise centering and just this reminder that 'ok...God's got me. I'm fine.' But then I came to something and no matter how hard I tried to come up with a line of "truth" to counter my fear, I couldn't. "Wait, God. There really have been times where I've felt like you were apathetic, where I felt you treated me more like a servant and less like your beloved child. There really have been times where you didn't come through and it's felt like I've just had to handle things on my own." And I fought with God and myself. The centeredness I'd felt just before turned into me being utterly pissed off and my breath was definitely not centered. I tried, but every ounce of "but God...."/"truth" statements that ran through my mind were Sunday school ingrained bullshit answers that didn't resonate or things my heart wanted to believe, but couldn't in that moment. I've had moments where I've run to God, leaned on him, and just felt his love in such a deep way. Then there's moments where I am utterly livid and me being pissed at God is often rooted in his failure to follow the formula I've been taught he and I should. "Ok, God, I knocked (I sang worship songs, went to church a lot, prayed, read my bible, asked you my request a billion times bla bla bla). Now, you open the door (grant my request because I've followed my half of the formula)." The definition of faith itself is sometimes diminished to following a formula and expecting God to do the same. "If he didn't answer, you didn't pray enough, prayed the wrong way, didn't trust enough. God had to limit his love because you fucked up on your part of the formula." Yet, the God who created breath itself cannot be limited by misconception-laced, control mongering formulas. Inhale Yah....exhale...weh. Thank you for that centering truth. I'm still learning how to release church ingrained bullshit and inhale the truth of God's identity.
"If he didn't answer, you didn't pray enough, prayed the wrong way, didn't trust enough. God had to limit his love because you fucked up on your part of the formula."
Precisely where I'm struggling now. Either it's God's success or my failure. Praying my way through these thoughts doesn't seem to be doing much good, but I've got no better answer..
I can relate. God’s love and how he works shouldn’t be limited to a formula. God as our creator and the one who breathed life into us wants us to be part of what he is doing.
As usual your messages dive deep into my spirit and give me such peace and encouragement. You truly have a gift for this. Saying Thank You just seems so inadequate but it’s all I can think to say,,,,,,,,,,Thank You
Nadia, i am once again moved to write. I could not stop chewing on this message.
I have been grieved that the pastors who formed much of my childhood faith, who believed and respected separation of church and state - grieved that they did not foresee and did not speak out against the dangers of ‘moral majority’ and third wave revival and penal substitutionary doctrine and the worship of capitalism. Grieved that my nephews are in a church that teaches only the wealthy business owners should vote.
Nadia, i pray for you. It is not an easy walk to be a prophet. To speak truth. To show people a course correction. I pray we in the corners encourage and strengthen you. I pray the breath and grace of God continue to sustain you. I’m not sure those who are called could say no… but i am ever so grateful that you said yes.
I love what Anna Akhmatova wrote- I came across this in March 2020:
Everything is plundered, betrayed, sold,
Death’s great black wing scrapes the air,
Misery gnaws to the bone.
Why then do we not despair?
By day, from the surrounding woods,
cherries blow summer into town;
at night the deep transparent skies
glitter with new galaxies.
And the miraculous comes so close
to the ruined, dirty houses
something not known to any one at all,
but wild in our breast for centuries.
This week is the Friends General Conference gathering- liberal unprogrammed Quakers, on Zoom. I will spend time with wise people. My task before the gathering is to meditate on "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God". Is my heart purifying? I think it is. The Corners helps.
And- forgive the link- Saturday was the big Pride march in London, but on Friday was the actual 50th anniversary, when a more anarchic crowd gathered, with activists who support refugees and other causes. We were chanting "We're not free till everyone's free" and "Our bodies Our choice."
Brilliant, a perfect balance of heart and mind,. God's truth speaks so eloquently through you. And I am now grateful to have discovered you. Blessings upon your days, and I look forward to hearing you more often.
As we drove yesterday to a small Nebraska town to participate in a Women's Rights March, my friend talked about your sermon and then pretty much outlined it completely. (I hadn't yet checked my email to find it) And then we stood and marched and used our collective breath to cry out for justice. What you preach here is where we find our grounding. Thank you.
Sitting here, doing what I call baby steps in my home therapy after shoulder surgery( 6-29) which was pretty much all my doc could do after falling over a year ago and the first doc I went to said he refused to order an MRI, maybe there will be follow on surgery, just don’t know, this reminds me to breath, thanks so much Pastor Nadia
My meditation this morning was acceptance, here and now. Acceptance even more than hope. For hope, no matter how necessary to help me through the pain and difficulty of now, hope is about the future. But I live in the now. I meet God in the now. God comes to me and invites me in the now.
The world overall progresses to inclusion, no matter how backwards things seem at the moment. Those who move backwards have already lost, they have already been and always will be defeated. I have to hold onto this hope, however bleak the now seems, the now that I pray to accept.
Once more I live into hevel, the contradictory, the enigmatic, the unknowable, holding all the contradictory feelings at once, knowing and believing that in the end, maybe beyond my end, but still the end, it will be just fine.
What a wonderful message. I am 70 years old and marvel at how quickly comfort turns to chaos. We were so afraid of COVID and now are faced with the death of innocents at the hand of a crazy man, death of our beloved children at the hands of crazy people with guns, and now 50 years of personal freedom brought to an end. It's too much! But now I'm reminded that we breathe in the moment and that's where the holy spirit lives for each of us. Thank you Nadia!
Well said, Judith. I am also (very nearly) 70. I am more alert to possible dangers, especially when I visit my 94 year old client who lives in lower downtown in Denver. I've been coming here for 7 years and have never had any trouble or concerns. I enjoyed being in the area because it was becoming a beautiful place to be. But of recently I have been concerned about the amount of drug trafficking's goings on in the restored Union Station, and people with guns. I need to stop, breathe, engage with YahWeh, and bring peace into myself in the present and be grateful for the good folks who are at work trying to keep us safe. I am safe. No bad things are happening to me right now, except all the distress of what I read, see and hear has taken a toll on my nerves and my husband gets to experience my stress, something he does not deserve.
My stress sneaks up on me. My poor husband. He's such a good guy but never knows what to expect. My daughter sent me a link for Nadia. Love, love, love her. Her words keep me centered and that chases the stress away. Be still and know that I am God - and breathe!
This sermon was exactly what I needed today. God surely spoke through you for many of us!
Thanks, Jenni.
My breath centers me and is my strength and grounding. I've had voice training since maybe age 12 or 13. So, an awareness of my breath and how I'm using it, how it is giving strength to my body and volume to my voice has just always been a normal part of my life. My breath relaxes me because it is my source of power and strength.
Nadia, I loved how you brought up the idea that oxygen itself is the breath of God breathed into us. Just like breath itself, God is my source of strength and the one who centers me and gives me rest when my body and mind are refusing to slow down.
A while ago, I tried to do an exercise where I would try to replace my fears with truth. I'd pray for example, "I fear......., but God, I know......."
For a while, I found the exercise centering and just this reminder that 'ok...God's got me. I'm fine.' But then I came to something and no matter how hard I tried to come up with a line of "truth" to counter my fear, I couldn't. "Wait, God. There really have been times where I've felt like you were apathetic, where I felt you treated me more like a servant and less like your beloved child. There really have been times where you didn't come through and it's felt like I've just had to handle things on my own." And I fought with God and myself. The centeredness I'd felt just before turned into me being utterly pissed off and my breath was definitely not centered. I tried, but every ounce of "but God...."/"truth" statements that ran through my mind were Sunday school ingrained bullshit answers that didn't resonate or things my heart wanted to believe, but couldn't in that moment. I've had moments where I've run to God, leaned on him, and just felt his love in such a deep way. Then there's moments where I am utterly livid and me being pissed at God is often rooted in his failure to follow the formula I've been taught he and I should. "Ok, God, I knocked (I sang worship songs, went to church a lot, prayed, read my bible, asked you my request a billion times bla bla bla). Now, you open the door (grant my request because I've followed my half of the formula)." The definition of faith itself is sometimes diminished to following a formula and expecting God to do the same. "If he didn't answer, you didn't pray enough, prayed the wrong way, didn't trust enough. God had to limit his love because you fucked up on your part of the formula." Yet, the God who created breath itself cannot be limited by misconception-laced, control mongering formulas. Inhale Yah....exhale...weh. Thank you for that centering truth. I'm still learning how to release church ingrained bullshit and inhale the truth of God's identity.
"If he didn't answer, you didn't pray enough, prayed the wrong way, didn't trust enough. God had to limit his love because you fucked up on your part of the formula."
Precisely where I'm struggling now. Either it's God's success or my failure. Praying my way through these thoughts doesn't seem to be doing much good, but I've got no better answer..
I can relate. God’s love and how he works shouldn’t be limited to a formula. God as our creator and the one who breathed life into us wants us to be part of what he is doing.
I'm enraptured with your choice of metaphor, Nadia. Breath runs through us all and fuels us, so it makes so much sense for you to stress it.
As usual your messages dive deep into my spirit and give me such peace and encouragement. You truly have a gift for this. Saying Thank You just seems so inadequate but it’s all I can think to say,,,,,,,,,,Thank You
Nadia, i am once again moved to write. I could not stop chewing on this message.
I have been grieved that the pastors who formed much of my childhood faith, who believed and respected separation of church and state - grieved that they did not foresee and did not speak out against the dangers of ‘moral majority’ and third wave revival and penal substitutionary doctrine and the worship of capitalism. Grieved that my nephews are in a church that teaches only the wealthy business owners should vote.
Nadia, i pray for you. It is not an easy walk to be a prophet. To speak truth. To show people a course correction. I pray we in the corners encourage and strengthen you. I pray the breath and grace of God continue to sustain you. I’m not sure those who are called could say no… but i am ever so grateful that you said yes.
Peace!
You DO. You guys truly encourage and support me. I feel this so deeply. Thank you.
Inhale - yeh
Exhale - web
Amen.
Thank you. Let us console each other.
I love what Anna Akhmatova wrote- I came across this in March 2020:
Everything is plundered, betrayed, sold,
Death’s great black wing scrapes the air,
Misery gnaws to the bone.
Why then do we not despair?
By day, from the surrounding woods,
cherries blow summer into town;
at night the deep transparent skies
glitter with new galaxies.
And the miraculous comes so close
to the ruined, dirty houses
something not known to any one at all,
but wild in our breast for centuries.
This week is the Friends General Conference gathering- liberal unprogrammed Quakers, on Zoom. I will spend time with wise people. My task before the gathering is to meditate on "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God". Is my heart purifying? I think it is. The Corners helps.
And- forgive the link- Saturday was the big Pride march in London, but on Friday was the actual 50th anniversary, when a more anarchic crowd gathered, with activists who support refugees and other causes. We were chanting "We're not free till everyone's free" and "Our bodies Our choice."
Tell me what community looks like
This is what community looks like.
I feel profoundly affirmed by that. Here are some photos: http://clareflourish.wordpress.com/2022/07/02/pride-is-a-protest/
Brilliant, a perfect balance of heart and mind,. God's truth speaks so eloquently through you. And I am now grateful to have discovered you. Blessings upon your days, and I look forward to hearing you more often.
As we drove yesterday to a small Nebraska town to participate in a Women's Rights March, my friend talked about your sermon and then pretty much outlined it completely. (I hadn't yet checked my email to find it) And then we stood and marched and used our collective breath to cry out for justice. What you preach here is where we find our grounding. Thank you.
Great sermon. Am currently reading Richard Rohr but love the way you connect it to this terrible week.
Thank you and thank you.
Sitting here, doing what I call baby steps in my home therapy after shoulder surgery( 6-29) which was pretty much all my doc could do after falling over a year ago and the first doc I went to said he refused to order an MRI, maybe there will be follow on surgery, just don’t know, this reminds me to breath, thanks so much Pastor Nadia
I love this sermon. God Bless you, Nadia!
My meditation this morning was acceptance, here and now. Acceptance even more than hope. For hope, no matter how necessary to help me through the pain and difficulty of now, hope is about the future. But I live in the now. I meet God in the now. God comes to me and invites me in the now.
The world overall progresses to inclusion, no matter how backwards things seem at the moment. Those who move backwards have already lost, they have already been and always will be defeated. I have to hold onto this hope, however bleak the now seems, the now that I pray to accept.
Once more I live into hevel, the contradictory, the enigmatic, the unknowable, holding all the contradictory feelings at once, knowing and believing that in the end, maybe beyond my end, but still the end, it will be just fine.
It reminds me of The Stockade Paradox - worth looking up!
I did just that. Yeah, that's where we are.
And your spider fears are spot-on right. ;)
LOL, my 10 year old found a spider on her floor, so she sleeps on the couch now.