Oh my- as someone who has watched a young adult child suffer from the most severe mental illness with multiple hospitalizations for psychosis and received judgments - shame - shunning… thank you for seeing and proclaiming God’s grace, love, and mercy are for me and mine. As extended Pentecostal family said i had invited demons, and my atheist friends said genetics were bad -abandon your child… others avoided me not knowing what to do….. i hoped and prayed. As i watched pastors from her church make daily visits to cancer patients and yet no visits to our family. My anger and isolation grew.
Medication has returned things to normal for us (at least for now). Now if i can just find a way to forgive and release the anger towards those who added to our suffering. While i understand that fear motivated all to blame or shun me, i wish they would have attacked their fear instead. God have mercy. God forgive me and help me to forgive. Christ have mercy.
Since writing, i have remembered people of grace that God supplied during the last two years of struggle. I am so grateful to people of the corners and to those friends who were able to sit with me during the tough times. I was not alone in this life… even if excluded from some places. Thanks be to God.
Reading these lines you wrote "The self-blaming thoughts of - if I had only not worked so many hours, if I had only left their dad before things got as bad as they did, if only I didn't let them hang out with those other kids..." could have been taken from a page in my book.
Oh, Teacher, look at my child(ren). I've asked for help but no one in my community has known what to do, so please, take a look, and heal them. Thank you for being with us here in the valley. Amen.
Yes. We have spiritual experiences and are forever changed by them. Mine occurred when I found the courage to join a 12 Step Group for Adult Children of Alcoholics. I was transformed from being "an ice cube with a storm going on inside of it" - a picture I drew of myself in art therapy - to a soul that was cleansed of its inner storm by sharing experiences, strength, and hope with the members of my fellowship. I say that this took courage and faith because I was taught that our family's secret was to be kept secret, even at the expense of our (my siblings and my) mental and physical health. Pretty on the outside, I felt dirty on the inside and always sad and tired. When I confessed once to a friend, she said, "You don't look like the kind of person who comes from THAT kind of family." I live in Colorado, so I've climbed mountains and even went to Nepal to support friends who were climbing Everest. But I've never climbed a mountain that took the kind of strength that recovery can take - but the freedom and love of others that came from this journey was well worth the climb. Thanks for being here, Nadia. I am a Lutheran too. :)
The outcome helped me grow in compassion for my dad and acceptance of my mother's struggles with being an exhausted, unreliable co-dependent. Thanks be to the Light!
I always secretly thought those "faithless and perverse" words were coming from a guy going thru a big time buzz kill, like first day back at work after an excellent vacation.
This. Oh em gee. This. Listen. I typically love pretty much everything you write. Which is why I’m here. But this. Holy crap. After witnessing depression take down my beautiful boy fit over two years, this just HIT HOME. By the time I got to the end I was nearly breathless. Thank you. So. Much.
In church yesterday I felt so alone in the valley and so confused by Jesus' lack of grace (as I perceived it at the time). This makes so much more sense. Yet again it looks like Jesus is there for those suffering, and not at all there for the holier than thou people who don't want to get their hands dirty.
For me, the transfiguration is a spiritual experience. Humans have spiritual experiences. Common ones include feeling you are at one with all of Creation, or that you are completely present in this moment, and all your senses are alive. Such spiritual experiences can give an intense sensation of joy, a natural high you might need substances to achieve otherwise.
And, we can't put up a tent, stay in those spiritual experiences. After enlightenment, hew wood and draw water. But, they are possible, for all human beings, and if you seek them you will find them. And they continue giving that natural joy. The light of God is in each of us, and we can directly perceive that light, and speak and act from it.
Just found this. My husband and I were reading the Matthew version, wondering why the story should have meaning today. When I read the Luke version, and your distillation of the story's entire meaning, then it rang true. My husband said the reason the disciples were warned not to speak of their experience was because of the times of persecution they were in.
Oh my- as someone who has watched a young adult child suffer from the most severe mental illness with multiple hospitalizations for psychosis and received judgments - shame - shunning… thank you for seeing and proclaiming God’s grace, love, and mercy are for me and mine. As extended Pentecostal family said i had invited demons, and my atheist friends said genetics were bad -abandon your child… others avoided me not knowing what to do….. i hoped and prayed. As i watched pastors from her church make daily visits to cancer patients and yet no visits to our family. My anger and isolation grew.
Medication has returned things to normal for us (at least for now). Now if i can just find a way to forgive and release the anger towards those who added to our suffering. While i understand that fear motivated all to blame or shun me, i wish they would have attacked their fear instead. God have mercy. God forgive me and help me to forgive. Christ have mercy.
Since writing, i have remembered people of grace that God supplied during the last two years of struggle. I am so grateful to people of the corners and to those friends who were able to sit with me during the tough times. I was not alone in this life… even if excluded from some places. Thanks be to God.
I don't even know if I can articulate how moving this piece is in my life right now. It resonates. Thank you for writing and sharing.
Reading these lines you wrote "The self-blaming thoughts of - if I had only not worked so many hours, if I had only left their dad before things got as bad as they did, if only I didn't let them hang out with those other kids..." could have been taken from a page in my book.
Oh, Teacher, look at my child(ren). I've asked for help but no one in my community has known what to do, so please, take a look, and heal them. Thank you for being with us here in the valley. Amen.
Yes. We have spiritual experiences and are forever changed by them. Mine occurred when I found the courage to join a 12 Step Group for Adult Children of Alcoholics. I was transformed from being "an ice cube with a storm going on inside of it" - a picture I drew of myself in art therapy - to a soul that was cleansed of its inner storm by sharing experiences, strength, and hope with the members of my fellowship. I say that this took courage and faith because I was taught that our family's secret was to be kept secret, even at the expense of our (my siblings and my) mental and physical health. Pretty on the outside, I felt dirty on the inside and always sad and tired. When I confessed once to a friend, she said, "You don't look like the kind of person who comes from THAT kind of family." I live in Colorado, so I've climbed mountains and even went to Nepal to support friends who were climbing Everest. But I've never climbed a mountain that took the kind of strength that recovery can take - but the freedom and love of others that came from this journey was well worth the climb. Thanks for being here, Nadia. I am a Lutheran too. :)
The outcome helped me grow in compassion for my dad and acceptance of my mother's struggles with being an exhausted, unreliable co-dependent. Thanks be to the Light!
I always secretly thought those "faithless and perverse" words were coming from a guy going thru a big time buzz kill, like first day back at work after an excellent vacation.
This. Oh em gee. This. Listen. I typically love pretty much everything you write. Which is why I’m here. But this. Holy crap. After witnessing depression take down my beautiful boy fit over two years, this just HIT HOME. By the time I got to the end I was nearly breathless. Thank you. So. Much.
The best thing about the Transfiguration I've ever heard or read. Yeah, what about us? We are the man with the only child, and the child. Thank you.
Thank you for this. And for sharing Ivanka Demchuk’s stunning art. Your message really hit home.
This is so good—and so refreshing! Nadia nails it again!
In church yesterday I felt so alone in the valley and so confused by Jesus' lack of grace (as I perceived it at the time). This makes so much more sense. Yet again it looks like Jesus is there for those suffering, and not at all there for the holier than thou people who don't want to get their hands dirty.
Thank you so much for your great work! Your honesty and humility are awe-inspiring!
For me, the transfiguration is a spiritual experience. Humans have spiritual experiences. Common ones include feeling you are at one with all of Creation, or that you are completely present in this moment, and all your senses are alive. Such spiritual experiences can give an intense sensation of joy, a natural high you might need substances to achieve otherwise.
And, we can't put up a tent, stay in those spiritual experiences. After enlightenment, hew wood and draw water. But, they are possible, for all human beings, and if you seek them you will find them. And they continue giving that natural joy. The light of God is in each of us, and we can directly perceive that light, and speak and act from it.
I needed this. Thank you so much.
Just found this. My husband and I were reading the Matthew version, wondering why the story should have meaning today. When I read the Luke version, and your distillation of the story's entire meaning, then it rang true. My husband said the reason the disciples were warned not to speak of their experience was because of the times of persecution they were in.
I just had to order one of Ivana's prints. I cannot wait to display it on my wall. Thank you for pointing me in her direction
Thank you for helping me understand this gospel story in a new way. I am grateful for your wisdom and compassion.