Today is my 65th birthday. I received messages and cards, but the best gift of all was from my brother. I'm an Urban Missioner--priest to a community of marginally housed folks in a messy city. Sometimes I think my family doesn't really understand what I do, but my brother sent me four gallons of hand sanitizer for my birthday! And a gazillion little bottles so I can decant it and share.
God bless you him and what you do. They know not what they do as Jesus said! So go be blessed and do your thing your way for yawwahe. Happy birthday to You ! Specially made by God!!
Last night I allowed myself to cry, without judgment or stopping myself. Today, I sent flowers to a friend needing support. I bought $256 of red lipstick on Chanel for myself, and I didn't yell at the contractor. I drank water. And made my bed and washed my face. I acknowledged I am grieving, that this grief is ephemeral and I no longer need to have a concrete marker to identify to feel fractured and hurt. I will be gentle with myself today. And try, oh lord, try to remember to breathe.
The collective consciousness is so heavy now and has been for months. We are all going through one (or more!) of the 5 stages of grief for multiple things all the time! Crying is so cathartic, too.
Thank you for posting this. I had a long cry last night too. I'm exhausted from the injustice in our country, and from doing the "distance dance" with people who don't wear masks or keep 6 feet apart. Today I will breathe, and allow my grief, anger, and exhaustion to be.
innumerable texts, cards, gift memorials that have come my way since the death of my simple humble 81 year old dad.... the grief is fresh and jagged, but the acts of love and kindness help to soften the edges...
I took my dog for a window visit with my elderly mom who has dementia and lives in an assisted living facility. We can't go in, so we can only talk through the window. I picked up my dog and held him up to the window, she was happy and talked to him. He usually doesn't like to be held, but I guess he understood on some level because he wagged his tail and followed her hand as it moved back and forth across the window. Did I nemntionbit made my mom happy? My mom is never happy about anything, so it was a gift to me as well as her.
My friend Janel sent me a marco polo video and at the end she played me a song on her ukelele and the song was so beautiful and she is so beautiful and it brought me such joy. I'm trying to hang on to those moments.
This is beautiful. Even though I don't know this Marco Polo of which you speak. Reminds me, still, of watching tv with a long time friend the other night but zoom. He picked old Baywatch episodes and did commentary throughout... Like MST3K.
Yesterday, I went antiquing with my friend Katy P. Katy is the kind of friend who will come to my house when I'm having a major depressive episode, text me to tell me who is on my porch, in case I'm hiding from visitors, then take me to look around a thrift store and not bother me with a bunch of "cheer up" bullshit. (That happened last March.) Yesterday was just a day of antiquing. She got a cool ashtray for her wife and I got a hood ornament for my truck. It was a normal outing - with masks.
Kindness and love can be just a normal day with a friend.
I am the oldest person and widow in my small neighborhood and Friday everyone showed up for a surprise 74th birthday party for me. It was filled with love, and lots of wine...... the best gifts ever!
I work as a phone counselor in call center. There's a router system that directs calls to each of us; it's prioritized on who's been waiting for a call the longest. Earlier this past week I talked to someone who was in a very difficult situation. He called back on Friday, and in the randomness of calls, timing, availability, and other uncontrollable variables, without his asking, the call was directed to me again. When this happens, I know that God is indeed working in the world ... not controlling everything ... but in the mix of actors and powers and forces. Right now, I need those reminders!
Your post lifted my spirits. It wasn't long ago that our society would suggest shame for people in your (and my) position. Asking for help is not easy, but it is often vital for change.
All the things you mention are a marathon, not a sprint. They take time and there may be plateaus and setbacks. Please remember people like me, with feelings like yours, when things happen to look down. Your progress lifts us when we need it; we are with you and support your journey.
Yes absolutely things go unnoticed. Yesterday I helped get a little girl (6) who as in need of a new bike a new one, then God said here take this to her as well. So now she has two bikes one for grama and one for moms house! And McDonald’s screwed up my order so sh got 3 cheeseburgers to share as well!! Even though the vegetables are better I wanted food and instead of big Mac they gave me 4 cheeseburgers two fries as I drove away I knew it was God speaking so I didn’t go back and yell at their inequities. I paid it forward . Little girl was greatful to receive both! Let’s hope grandma can see the good in it as well. Prayers for working relationship with grandma please children shall not suffer because of adult trust issues or controlling mannerisms. Bless me oh lord with the strength to persevere. In Jesus name this is my prayer. Thank you Nadia for sharing
Noticed how shut down I was to feeling and emotion when I did not cry for the family whose loved one had just died of covid in my ICU less than a month after they had gathered there to say goodbye to another family member. But got in my car on Friday to go home, checked phone, saw Chadwick Boseman had died after years long battle with cancer in and out of hospitals just like mine with a family just like theirs- and wept. Soon I was crying also for the many families who have come through the hospital these six months, and for the men and women who are in the jail where I also work and their beloveds. All of the grief and pain came surging through like the storm surge In Louisiana from the hurricane. And like that surge it was survivable after all. I cannot just block one emotion, wind up blocking all - so that when I tried to let one through out they all came. Saturday I ignored housework, played with my kittens, did FaceTime with my grandkids, watched Black Panther, and felt all the feelings I had tried to ignore. My eyes are puffy this morning. My heart is less heavy in my chest. Peace be.
Thank you for the laughter during your prayer. Laughter helps a lot. My friend, Kathie, goes to a farm stand every week and picks up Palisade peaches to deliver to all her friends who must remain at home because of covid or the unhealthy air quality from the Colorado fires.
Our sword is the word of God as we look at the Bible as the sword we carry it and we do not pierce each other but we eat instead use the word of God to come together. to protect our own minds and to continue to walk with the armour of God on us always. Blessing!
The young man at the fish store saw my son's excitement at stocking his first tank and forgave our ignorance and guided us through choosing perfect tank-mates.
Today is my 65th birthday. I received messages and cards, but the best gift of all was from my brother. I'm an Urban Missioner--priest to a community of marginally housed folks in a messy city. Sometimes I think my family doesn't really understand what I do, but my brother sent me four gallons of hand sanitizer for my birthday! And a gazillion little bottles so I can decant it and share.
God bless you him and what you do. They know not what they do as Jesus said! So go be blessed and do your thing your way for yawwahe. Happy birthday to You ! Specially made by God!!
Happy Meredyth Day :)
Happy Birthday, Meredyth!
Happy Birthday to you, Meredyth!
Last night I allowed myself to cry, without judgment or stopping myself. Today, I sent flowers to a friend needing support. I bought $256 of red lipstick on Chanel for myself, and I didn't yell at the contractor. I drank water. And made my bed and washed my face. I acknowledged I am grieving, that this grief is ephemeral and I no longer need to have a concrete marker to identify to feel fractured and hurt. I will be gentle with myself today. And try, oh lord, try to remember to breathe.
The collective consciousness is so heavy now and has been for months. We are all going through one (or more!) of the 5 stages of grief for multiple things all the time! Crying is so cathartic, too.
that's good work. x
Hugs. Grief is so necessary so walk in it knowing it fades and makes us wiser.
Thank you for posting this. I had a long cry last night too. I'm exhausted from the injustice in our country, and from doing the "distance dance" with people who don't wear masks or keep 6 feet apart. Today I will breathe, and allow my grief, anger, and exhaustion to be.
You are healing. Take your time. Take whatever you need. Every time you FEEL, let that be a reminder to breathe deeply. You are loved.
innumerable texts, cards, gift memorials that have come my way since the death of my simple humble 81 year old dad.... the grief is fresh and jagged, but the acts of love and kindness help to soften the edges...
I took my dog for a window visit with my elderly mom who has dementia and lives in an assisted living facility. We can't go in, so we can only talk through the window. I picked up my dog and held him up to the window, she was happy and talked to him. He usually doesn't like to be held, but I guess he understood on some level because he wagged his tail and followed her hand as it moved back and forth across the window. Did I nemntionbit made my mom happy? My mom is never happy about anything, so it was a gift to me as well as her.
My friend Janel sent me a marco polo video and at the end she played me a song on her ukelele and the song was so beautiful and she is so beautiful and it brought me such joy. I'm trying to hang on to those moments.
This is beautiful. Even though I don't know this Marco Polo of which you speak. Reminds me, still, of watching tv with a long time friend the other night but zoom. He picked old Baywatch episodes and did commentary throughout... Like MST3K.
Yesterday, I went antiquing with my friend Katy P. Katy is the kind of friend who will come to my house when I'm having a major depressive episode, text me to tell me who is on my porch, in case I'm hiding from visitors, then take me to look around a thrift store and not bother me with a bunch of "cheer up" bullshit. (That happened last March.) Yesterday was just a day of antiquing. She got a cool ashtray for her wife and I got a hood ornament for my truck. It was a normal outing - with masks.
Kindness and love can be just a normal day with a friend.
I am the oldest person and widow in my small neighborhood and Friday everyone showed up for a surprise 74th birthday party for me. It was filled with love, and lots of wine...... the best gifts ever!
happy birthday!
Happy belated birthday, Rosemary!
I work as a phone counselor in call center. There's a router system that directs calls to each of us; it's prioritized on who's been waiting for a call the longest. Earlier this past week I talked to someone who was in a very difficult situation. He called back on Friday, and in the randomness of calls, timing, availability, and other uncontrollable variables, without his asking, the call was directed to me again. When this happens, I know that God is indeed working in the world ... not controlling everything ... but in the mix of actors and powers and forces. Right now, I need those reminders!
I love it when that happens. <3
I am choosing to be kind to myself. I started therapy and I am taking an antidepressant. I ran today.
Your post lifted my spirits. It wasn't long ago that our society would suggest shame for people in your (and my) position. Asking for help is not easy, but it is often vital for change.
All the things you mention are a marathon, not a sprint. They take time and there may be plateaus and setbacks. Please remember people like me, with feelings like yours, when things happen to look down. Your progress lifts us when we need it; we are with you and support your journey.
Yes absolutely things go unnoticed. Yesterday I helped get a little girl (6) who as in need of a new bike a new one, then God said here take this to her as well. So now she has two bikes one for grama and one for moms house! And McDonald’s screwed up my order so sh got 3 cheeseburgers to share as well!! Even though the vegetables are better I wanted food and instead of big Mac they gave me 4 cheeseburgers two fries as I drove away I knew it was God speaking so I didn’t go back and yell at their inequities. I paid it forward . Little girl was greatful to receive both! Let’s hope grandma can see the good in it as well. Prayers for working relationship with grandma please children shall not suffer because of adult trust issues or controlling mannerisms. Bless me oh lord with the strength to persevere. In Jesus name this is my prayer. Thank you Nadia for sharing
I just got a post cemented in this morning for a Paxton’s blessing box (mini food pantry in our city) in my yard!
Noticed how shut down I was to feeling and emotion when I did not cry for the family whose loved one had just died of covid in my ICU less than a month after they had gathered there to say goodbye to another family member. But got in my car on Friday to go home, checked phone, saw Chadwick Boseman had died after years long battle with cancer in and out of hospitals just like mine with a family just like theirs- and wept. Soon I was crying also for the many families who have come through the hospital these six months, and for the men and women who are in the jail where I also work and their beloveds. All of the grief and pain came surging through like the storm surge In Louisiana from the hurricane. And like that surge it was survivable after all. I cannot just block one emotion, wind up blocking all - so that when I tried to let one through out they all came. Saturday I ignored housework, played with my kittens, did FaceTime with my grandkids, watched Black Panther, and felt all the feelings I had tried to ignore. My eyes are puffy this morning. My heart is less heavy in my chest. Peace be.
sometimes that's what it takes, and then it all floods in.
God bless you and, somehow, comfort us all.
Thank you for the laughter during your prayer. Laughter helps a lot. My friend, Kathie, goes to a farm stand every week and picks up Palisade peaches to deliver to all her friends who must remain at home because of covid or the unhealthy air quality from the Colorado fires.
For this post that reminds me that it isn't easy now but we can put our sword down sometimes.
For so many people who pray for my hubbie and myself as we speak courage to hurting people in Granada.
For the wonderful blessing of being alone for a few days and going to a mountain retreat.
For watching a sermon today that didn't preach but just reminded us to be grateful and know that Peace pursues Thanksgiving
Our sword is the word of God as we look at the Bible as the sword we carry it and we do not pierce each other but we eat instead use the word of God to come together. to protect our own minds and to continue to walk with the armour of God on us always. Blessing!
May we have a link to that sermon, perhaps?
https://youtu.be/NHq29DEjyC8
Thank you!
I want to freak but cannot. Too much work to get our farm cleaned up from the derecho, presently.
The young man at the fish store saw my son's excitement at stocking his first tank and forgave our ignorance and guided us through choosing perfect tank-mates.