To see Anne Lamott in the subject line of this morn's missive made me SQUEEE-- I tell everyone who will listen.. the right wing loons are NOT the voice of REAL love and REAL Jesus moving in our fucked up lives and our fucked up souls and our fucked up hearts-- you know who is?? My modern Holy Trinity -- Nadia, Anne, and and John Pavlovitz :D
oh my pleasure.. he's the only one so far I have been blessed to see live, get my books signed, and get a pic with him-- he's glorious. Just like my other two trinity members :)
I haven't yet figured out how you read my mind when you write these Sunday prayers, but thanks for doing so. (You make them way more eloquent than I would.)
In my case, they remember the pizza, the breadsticks, the dipping sauce, the pizza-sized chocolate chip cookie . . . but never the salad that I definitely ordered. :p
I feel weird posting a comment after a prayer about how much better things and people “should be” when the last week has actually been good to me for some mysterious reason. I got a beautiful email from someone, found an nice outdoor gym and started a sunday routine, got a couple compliments I believe that would normally bounce right off, and I was even able to schedule the first dose of the vaccine for tomorrow afternoon, though I feel pretty unworthy when there are far more essential workers out there.
Regarding expectations we have about what “should be” about situations and people... I tend to expect the absolute worst, and while doing so allows me to be pleasantly surprised pretty often, it kind of sucks as a default, so I try consciously to expect the best. Better, probably, to expect people and situations to be all we want them to be and more, and then embrace disappointment when they aren’t. Something about that seems healthier and more honest. Then again...who knows.
I LOVE this, by the way...“So I am remanding myself into your protective custody, because you are always kinder to me than I am to myself.” 🙏🏻❤️ Thank you Nadia...your words have power.
I’ve been particularly irritable this week. There are a lot of stupid things happening and no one is saying the right things, but I don’t have to add to the negatives. Thanks for the reminder to extend grace to those around me.
I am with you, and have been confronted repeatedly in recent months with how much my attachment to the way things "should be done", especially in regards to conflict, just creates so much suffering. I wrote a few weeks back in my newsletter, "It would be so great if it were possible to only be in relationship with people who handle conflict exactly how I like to handle conflict, but the Universe has patently ignored my repeated memos on this proposal. I suspect It thinks this is a good learning strategy, to leave me with no other option but to figure out how to be connected to other people without losing myself, and thus my integrity, in the process...So, given the seemingly paradoxical reality that I want to love people intimately and they keep insisting on not being exactly how I want them to be so that I can feel safe and secure at all times, I’ve been reading up on conflict (in between tv binges). Specifically, I’ve been reading up on cultural differences and conflict resolution...For me, telescoping out from the individual to the cultural when thinking about integrity and conflict helps me not to take the whole thing so personally, as if someone doing things differently from me is an intentional attempt to upset my apple cart. It also helps me remember that trying to get everyone around me to approach conflict the way I want them to doesn’t allow them to be in their integrity, which matters to me."
I will fully admit that there's a lot of pouting and resentment before I get to being constructively non-attached to what other people do. Luckily, God and my people still love me anyway, by all accounts. As Anne Lamott says, "Grace bats last."
Actually, I don't seem to get as frustrated (disappointed, amazed, pissed) as I used to with folks doing stupid crap , I think my 30 plus years at First Presbyterian sucked me dry of all that. I spend most of my time now trying to just do the work He has picked out for me to do, the other idiots are His problem
Just wanted to commiserate that I am also merciless on myself about the medication induced menopause and corresponding 20 pounds. And it's impossible to lose post menopause. Not for the faint of heart-those ceasing of the menses. Working hard to be kinder to myself, as Nadia pointed out. Thanks for the reminder--I needed it.
To see Anne Lamott in the subject line of this morn's missive made me SQUEEE-- I tell everyone who will listen.. the right wing loons are NOT the voice of REAL love and REAL Jesus moving in our fucked up lives and our fucked up souls and our fucked up hearts-- you know who is?? My modern Holy Trinity -- Nadia, Anne, and and John Pavlovitz :D
Thanks for the tip on John Pavlovitz. I’d never heard of him.
He's a truth-teller! (But your "real" Christian-y friends won't like him...)
oh my pleasure.. he's the only one so far I have been blessed to see live, get my books signed, and get a pic with him-- he's glorious. Just like my other two trinity members :)
I haven't yet figured out how you read my mind when you write these Sunday prayers, but thanks for doing so. (You make them way more eloquent than I would.)
good to know i'm not the only one suffering through the GrubHub item deprivation. They always remember the pizza, but never the salad, amiright?! ;-)
In my case, they remember the pizza, the breadsticks, the dipping sauce, the pizza-sized chocolate chip cookie . . . but never the salad that I definitely ordered. :p
I feel weird posting a comment after a prayer about how much better things and people “should be” when the last week has actually been good to me for some mysterious reason. I got a beautiful email from someone, found an nice outdoor gym and started a sunday routine, got a couple compliments I believe that would normally bounce right off, and I was even able to schedule the first dose of the vaccine for tomorrow afternoon, though I feel pretty unworthy when there are far more essential workers out there.
Regarding expectations we have about what “should be” about situations and people... I tend to expect the absolute worst, and while doing so allows me to be pleasantly surprised pretty often, it kind of sucks as a default, so I try consciously to expect the best. Better, probably, to expect people and situations to be all we want them to be and more, and then embrace disappointment when they aren’t. Something about that seems healthier and more honest. Then again...who knows.
I LOVE this, by the way...“So I am remanding myself into your protective custody, because you are always kinder to me than I am to myself.” 🙏🏻❤️ Thank you Nadia...your words have power.
I’ve been particularly irritable this week. There are a lot of stupid things happening and no one is saying the right things, but I don’t have to add to the negatives. Thanks for the reminder to extend grace to those around me.
I am with you, and have been confronted repeatedly in recent months with how much my attachment to the way things "should be done", especially in regards to conflict, just creates so much suffering. I wrote a few weeks back in my newsletter, "It would be so great if it were possible to only be in relationship with people who handle conflict exactly how I like to handle conflict, but the Universe has patently ignored my repeated memos on this proposal. I suspect It thinks this is a good learning strategy, to leave me with no other option but to figure out how to be connected to other people without losing myself, and thus my integrity, in the process...So, given the seemingly paradoxical reality that I want to love people intimately and they keep insisting on not being exactly how I want them to be so that I can feel safe and secure at all times, I’ve been reading up on conflict (in between tv binges). Specifically, I’ve been reading up on cultural differences and conflict resolution...For me, telescoping out from the individual to the cultural when thinking about integrity and conflict helps me not to take the whole thing so personally, as if someone doing things differently from me is an intentional attempt to upset my apple cart. It also helps me remember that trying to get everyone around me to approach conflict the way I want them to doesn’t allow them to be in their integrity, which matters to me."
I will fully admit that there's a lot of pouting and resentment before I get to being constructively non-attached to what other people do. Luckily, God and my people still love me anyway, by all accounts. As Anne Lamott says, "Grace bats last."
This was more me than you usually are. 🦉🌺🦎
Actually, I don't seem to get as frustrated (disappointed, amazed, pissed) as I used to with folks doing stupid crap , I think my 30 plus years at First Presbyterian sucked me dry of all that. I spend most of my time now trying to just do the work He has picked out for me to do, the other idiots are His problem
Just wanted to commiserate that I am also merciless on myself about the medication induced menopause and corresponding 20 pounds. And it's impossible to lose post menopause. Not for the faint of heart-those ceasing of the menses. Working hard to be kinder to myself, as Nadia pointed out. Thanks for the reminder--I needed it.
Love getting book and podcast recommendations. Thank you.
Thank You, Nadia. Those were beautiful words and sentiments.
Thanks.
I will give the yoga another shot if u do.