Thank you, Nadia. The voice on repeat, the one that gets super loud each time I pass in front of the mirror, is such a jerk…so much so that I oftentimes try hard to avoid mirrors altogether. Just writing these words makes me remember an awesome sermon you gave last year about the woman with the bent back. I wrote down a powerful quote you said and put it on my bulletin board. Clearly I need to read this more: “God saves me IN my body, not FROM, my body.” — NBW
Thank you Nadia. Honestly, my family loved Stuart Smalley growing up so it was nice to be reminded of my mother rushing us off to school saying "You're good enough, smart enough, and gosh darn it people like you!" Haha. I also highly recommend naming the mean voice in your head. Mine is named Amelia. She's a pretentious loser who sucks and I like the distance it put between me and her. haha.
A friend of mine did that on the recommendation of her therapist! So when she’s having a hard day, she says Jane is being a real bitch today, and both tell Jane off. ❤️
I'm glad I read this today. As I awoke this morning, the tape playing inside my head was, "I hate myself. Jesus, please help me not to hate myself." Honest to God, there is no earthly or, even, Heavenly reason for me to hate myself or say so. I would never say to another human being the things that I often say to myself. Why the hell is that? The answer's in the question, huh! Thank you for writing this. I'm so glad that I read it. Maybe Someone is trying to tell me something.
I had some of those thoughts this morning as I mentally went through my things to do list today, realizing the list would have been realistic in my 20's, not in my 60's.
Each days physical energy is less than it was the day before, that's just a fact of life. Thanks for reminding me to stop being an internal asshole to myself.
Bob, it was really helpful to read this. It's a truth in my life, as well, but I hesitate to give it credit. Acceptance that we wind down and are, for most of our lives, in the process of winding down. Powerful reminder.
I wrote about something similar this week! I think of the critical voices in my head as a committee, or a many-headed hydra, and I'm only just now realizing that I can appoint new members to my committee, kinder, more loving elders who actually care about me and my well-being. Because the assholes in our heads suck! And they don't deserve to be there at all. Who said they can have a seat at our mental table in the first place? May we collectively learn how to give them the boot.
Thank you for this. I have never been so down on myself and just made a list of all I could do to improve. One would think that by 72, we’d be comfortable with who we are. I needed to hear, I’m not the only one and, I already am okay, especially in relationship to God. Repentance. What a concept.
Great question, "What thought do you have most often about yourself to yourself?" Asked it to my men's prayer group. We are a vulnerable group but this operated much like a confession and encouragement session as a result.
I am so grateful that you and I seem to have hit menopause at roughly the same time. I’ve seen pictures of myself this weekend and in my head I expect myself to still look the way I looked 10-12 years ago.
Just to add: I didn't have to deal with menopause but I have a similar experience with body image. I wouldn't want to speak for all guys but I bet it's not uncommon. I pass by a store window and I think, 'Yuck. Who is that dumpy old guy with the fat belly and thinning hair?" In my head I'm still the semi-svelte guy I was 40 years ago with thick dark hair. I understand that St. Francis referred to his body as "Brother Ass" to keep from taking it too seriously. Maybe that's something to remember.
On Saturday, my wife and I celebrated 25 since the day we met. My daughter took a picture of us. All 25 years showed in the picture. May we find a way to stand in awe of it, rather than judgment!
Thank you, Nadia for your insightful reflection. It is a message I'm working at embracing. Your reflection echoes two of my favorite spiritual writers, Thomas Merton and Richard Rohr. What you speach, so eloquently, about they call the True-Self and the False-Self. I look forward to your regular missives. I appreciate your vulnerability and wisdom.
I'm working at naming the thing I do when I get in to a circle of negative self talk. Not only does it suck for me, I'm not paying attention to all the beautiful people, creatures and cool stuff going on around me. I find myself naming this to others as well and talking about the obvious that I sometimes forget - we are all doing that and it is a real drag on what is true, fun, funny and beautiful about ourselves and each other. Thanks for this today. You Rock!
I always read the comments from Nadia’s subscribers. Nadia is very wise so I learn something from her with every post but she also attracts an unusually smart and sensitive group of followers.
Thank you, Nadia. The voice on repeat, the one that gets super loud each time I pass in front of the mirror, is such a jerk…so much so that I oftentimes try hard to avoid mirrors altogether. Just writing these words makes me remember an awesome sermon you gave last year about the woman with the bent back. I wrote down a powerful quote you said and put it on my bulletin board. Clearly I need to read this more: “God saves me IN my body, not FROM, my body.” — NBW
😮💨♥️
Oh now come on. Quoting me back to myself! No fair. :)
Good stuff is good stuff 🤷♀️
That is so good!
She is so good!
Thank you Nadia. Honestly, my family loved Stuart Smalley growing up so it was nice to be reminded of my mother rushing us off to school saying "You're good enough, smart enough, and gosh darn it people like you!" Haha. I also highly recommend naming the mean voice in your head. Mine is named Amelia. She's a pretentious loser who sucks and I like the distance it put between me and her. haha.
A friend of mine did that on the recommendation of her therapist! So when she’s having a hard day, she says Jane is being a real bitch today, and both tell Jane off. ❤️
Love it! And I bet Jane sucks.
I love this… I’m going to name THAT Deborah Williamena.
Deborah Williamena is a great name! haha
What a great idea to give it a name. It puts distance in it.
I'm glad I read this today. As I awoke this morning, the tape playing inside my head was, "I hate myself. Jesus, please help me not to hate myself." Honest to God, there is no earthly or, even, Heavenly reason for me to hate myself or say so. I would never say to another human being the things that I often say to myself. Why the hell is that? The answer's in the question, huh! Thank you for writing this. I'm so glad that I read it. Maybe Someone is trying to tell me something.
I riffed on your post in a post of my own. Thanks again, Sister Nadia! https://themjkxn.substack.com/p/morning-has-broken
This is my favorite song right now
https://youtu.be/5fSVWVYkh2A?si=hKMmlawHrP0GT8q5
I'm so glad that I clicked to see what song, Lisa. WOW! How powerful. Thank you.
Beautiful! It reminds me of Lauren Daigles "You Say".
Thank you so much for the link to this song. I so
needed to hear it.
Wow! Yes!!!
Ciao Nadia
Well I think I have become a lot more gentle with myself recently, I'm 56 yo and it happened naturally.
Probably I stopped to care about the way I look to the others because the real me is ready to offer something better: the way I am.
The ideal me deserve some rest.
GBU all ❤️ you're wonderful
Thank You - Thank You - Thank You!
I had some of those thoughts this morning as I mentally went through my things to do list today, realizing the list would have been realistic in my 20's, not in my 60's.
Each days physical energy is less than it was the day before, that's just a fact of life. Thanks for reminding me to stop being an internal asshole to myself.
Bob, it was really helpful to read this. It's a truth in my life, as well, but I hesitate to give it credit. Acceptance that we wind down and are, for most of our lives, in the process of winding down. Powerful reminder.
Potential Bad: The narrative others tell us about who we are.
Potential Worse: The narrative we tell ourselves about who we are.
Guaranteed Good: The narrative God tells us about who we are.
I wrote about something similar this week! I think of the critical voices in my head as a committee, or a many-headed hydra, and I'm only just now realizing that I can appoint new members to my committee, kinder, more loving elders who actually care about me and my well-being. Because the assholes in our heads suck! And they don't deserve to be there at all. Who said they can have a seat at our mental table in the first place? May we collectively learn how to give them the boot.
Thank you for this. I have never been so down on myself and just made a list of all I could do to improve. One would think that by 72, we’d be comfortable with who we are. I needed to hear, I’m not the only one and, I already am okay, especially in relationship to God. Repentance. What a concept.
This is such an important reminder that those inner voices never go away, so we need to learn what to do with them. Thank you!
Great question, "What thought do you have most often about yourself to yourself?" Asked it to my men's prayer group. We are a vulnerable group but this operated much like a confession and encouragement session as a result.
The last line, I can always count on you to keep it real 😅
I am so grateful that you and I seem to have hit menopause at roughly the same time. I’ve seen pictures of myself this weekend and in my head I expect myself to still look the way I looked 10-12 years ago.
It’s brutal.
Just to add: I didn't have to deal with menopause but I have a similar experience with body image. I wouldn't want to speak for all guys but I bet it's not uncommon. I pass by a store window and I think, 'Yuck. Who is that dumpy old guy with the fat belly and thinning hair?" In my head I'm still the semi-svelte guy I was 40 years ago with thick dark hair. I understand that St. Francis referred to his body as "Brother Ass" to keep from taking it too seriously. Maybe that's something to remember.
On Saturday, my wife and I celebrated 25 since the day we met. My daughter took a picture of us. All 25 years showed in the picture. May we find a way to stand in awe of it, rather than judgment!
Bob, here's a song from a Franciscan priest that can encourage and strengthen you as a fellow "Brother Ass." https://youtu.be/Xdm4MqvhMJs?si=l_dHivkFow_r-zqb
And here's a great explanation of the song from the artist himself. https://youtu.be/fbREjJJbEas?si=MluJ8hermdozbY6q
Thanks for sharing those.
You're quite welcome. Your comment and my response inspired my latest post. https://themjkxn.substack.com/p/brother-ass
Yep. The look in the mirror sometimes is overwhelming.
Thank you, Nadia for your insightful reflection. It is a message I'm working at embracing. Your reflection echoes two of my favorite spiritual writers, Thomas Merton and Richard Rohr. What you speach, so eloquently, about they call the True-Self and the False-Self. I look forward to your regular missives. I appreciate your vulnerability and wisdom.
I was thinking of Merton too. Leave it to Nadia to write about the asshole in her head and to evoke Merton at the same time! 😂
I also find Eckhart Tolle very helpful.
I feel seen, really understood.
I'm working at naming the thing I do when I get in to a circle of negative self talk. Not only does it suck for me, I'm not paying attention to all the beautiful people, creatures and cool stuff going on around me. I find myself naming this to others as well and talking about the obvious that I sometimes forget - we are all doing that and it is a real drag on what is true, fun, funny and beautiful about ourselves and each other. Thanks for this today. You Rock!
I don't usually read comments but from now on, Nadia, I'm reading to yours!!
I always read the comments from Nadia’s subscribers. Nadia is very wise so I learn something from her with every post but she also attracts an unusually smart and sensitive group of followers.
Nadia's an amazing magnet, and you all are some amazing metal. Love this community.